fly free

Good by old friend,
One day we will be one again,
But just now i have no time, i leave you idle and allow your neglect.
I am a useless friend to you, and i am sorry.
So, for now you are free to fly amongst the universe.
and when i call you back to me i only hope that you will come.

truth

i am lost.................

Needs

I need your arms your tender kiss
I need your voice your whispered wish
I need your warmth your strength your tenderness
to feel you breath hot and wet on my cold neck
to see myself through your eyes and know my love your by my side
hand in hand untill the end
I miss you so
Come safe home......

Grandma Cleo

"Speak up love" She says as she pulls a thin cigarette from the top pocket of her old tattered pink dressing gown. "Her name is Mellisa." Her soft yellowing blue eyes dart down to the small peach colored woolen blanket in my arms. "Mellisa? very nice name dear. Very...Modern." I lift the blanket exposing the fluff of black hair crowning my baby's head. Mellisa opens her eyes as the cool breeze catches her face. The cigarette falls to the ground with the scattering of leaves. "May I...May I hold her" She stammers, eyes wide. I gently lower my baby into her frail thin arms. "she's......beautiful!" a small tear slips from her old sad eyes, "Pretty baby, hello child, i am your great great grandmother, what's her name again dear?" A sparkle hints beneath her aged stare.
"Mellisa." My baby opens her wide brown eyes and flutters her long eyelashes, her rosie cheeks dimple with her waking smile. "She's lovely, lovely baby, i wish i could see you grow, lovely baby." My baby laughs as a salty tear splashes her nose. "I'm sorry dear, i can't holder her, can you take her she's too heavy.....good by beautiful child....."

Red Ribbon Lass

Brown hair tied in red ribbon lass, catch the shy blue eyes of the lad.

He sits in silence, toes in sand while the ocean calls she’s close at hand.

And on the salty wind her song lifts lightly in bright melody.

She walks in sunshine seaming unaware of the lad who’s blue eyes glare,

jealous of the salty airs that kiss her cheeks so sweet and fair.

The ocean roars his heart to wake, but his feet can only quake,

and his toes dig deeper into the safety of the sandy shore.  

Gulls flying overhead soar to their evening bed.

Sun begins to sink below, blue sky’s blush and water glows.

She sits upon the tallest rock, her voice becomes a symphony.

The warmth of day begins to fade, and a sharp new wind blows westerly.

He lifts his feet from the deep cool sand, to search for firewood to warm his hands.

Small blue flames begin to bite, as sun sleeps and the stars begin their flight.

She gives her song out to the sea, the dark waters take it willingly,

and now she’s lost from his sight as there is no moon to give her light.

                                                                                                                                

Though the fire crackles on he feels his heart begin to morn.

He lost his chance, his only one, it went away with the sun.

And as a tear escapes his eyes, brown hair flickers by the fireside.

Her small soft hand touch his face, a laugh a kiss, a sweet embrace.     

She sung her song to call him near, he did not come, his love she feared,

and as the sun began to sink her song rung out to bring his feet.

When at last he did not come, her heart was empty the song was sung.

But then a glimpse of blue light flashed her heart fire kindled off she dashed.

By the fire his blue eyes fill her heart, hand in hand they will never part.

Brown hairs loose and red ribbon slips free, off on the west wind out to the bitter sea.

Henderson&Henderson Accounting&Tax

11x2.12+4.8+9x12+86.73
I can smell the coffee as it cools on my desk.
187+13.68x34+12.56x227
Sad 80's saxophone music breaks the silence as the elevator door opens.
197+83.24x15.67+45
"Hello."
I look up at the tall stranger in his boring black suit white shirt and brown tie. His blue eyes hazed over, uninterested. The beige on beige decor of the office reflecting the emptiness of our meeting.
"Mr Henderson?" His deep strong voice questions as he leans over my desk. "Accounting, or tax?" "Tax." "Third door on the left." He turns, trading his briefcase from his right hand to his left and straitening his brown tie. As he walks down the beige hallway towards the beige office of Mr Peter beige Henderson, his blond hair is stirred by the air-conditioning, tousling some prematurely gray strands over his face. I catch a glimpse of his battered gold watch as he wipes the hair away from his eyes. I note his clean well ironed suit is slightly too short for him and a few years out of style, clearly purchased secondhand or borrowed for this appointment. It wont help him; Mr Henderson cares only for numbers and efficiency. I vaguely hope to myself that he is hear to interview for the new position. If he is here on tax business and is already down on his luck, Mr Henderson is not going to improve things for him. I turn back to Mrs Chin's Bookkeeping. I wish she would write things out instead of just handing me a fistful of receipts at the end of every financial year. 18X22+56x87.45+100x44+58.55x32

untitled

It's like a shadow lurking in the corner of my eye
I see it when my mind is most at ease
I hear it in the dawn and dusk
It's enchanted song plays for me in the moon lit breeze
I hear it in the crash of the waves to the sand
I smell it in the cold salted air as it stings my face
I dream of it all night, but loose it as i wake
Then it begins to gnaw at the edges of my thoughts
Like something important I've forgotten
A debt I've jet to pay?
An appointment that I've missed?

Shadow dreams

Moon shine, night light
Holding hands, lovers lands
Hold me don't let me breath
cause i was lost up in my dreams

I saw the demons in the shadows
I saw the angels in the light
I saw baby's faces smiling
and I saw broken Fathers cry
I saw blood spilt on the floor
I saw the innocent being swept away
I saw what life was like and i don't want to live that way

Darkness all around
No love to be found
Shadows I can see
Hold on there's one of me!

Moon shine, night light
Holding hands, lovers lands
Hold me don't let me breath
cause i was lost up in my dreams.

Anonymous Reads

I have decided to focus this blog more on the inner cyclone that is my mind.
You can now find all new entrys into my reading list at http://anonymousreads.blogspot.com/
I am also learning to cook at http://anonymouskitchen.blogspot.com/
enjoy

Thoughts on life

Just a stray thought on my life.
My life is much like a house of cards. I often picture myself in an empty space standing on a dirt worn earthly ground building a huge house of cards. Some times the earth shakes and quakes and cracks appear in the cards, or in a particularly bad quake they all fall down and i start again. Each card i lay is like a flimsy cardboard decision i have made. Sometimes if the decision was bad the cards fall down. If I make good decisions i can build upon them and as i build more levels to my house those early decisions turn to stone, as i get higher they are enforced with steel and my life becomes set on a track towards something. If i build it well when i am done i can look back and my cards will be made of gold, or perhaps if it all goes wrong they will blow away like smoke and i'll be left exposed homeless and alone. Maybe we never finish and just go on and on until we vanish into the unknown.... .... ....

self worth

How much are you worth?
$1 one dollar?
$18 eighteen dollars an hour, 8 hours a day, 6 days a week?
$100 one hundred dollars an hour?
$500 five hundred?
All the money in your bank account?
Perhaps however much someone is willing to pay?
or do u measure your worth in words?
Beautiful?
Successful?
Sexy?
High Class?
Well dressed?
Fit?
Thin?
Young?
Mature?
Famous?
Popular?
Fashionable?
Trend setter?
Do you measure your worth in number of friends?
what abut Facebook followers?
Twitter?
You are worth more than all these things!
To measure your worth look into your heart,
Would your parents risk their life for yours?
Would your family lend you money without proof of return?
How do you treat those you hold dear?
How do you treat those beneath you?
How do you treat your those you don't like?
How do you behave when under the influence of drugs or alcohol?
Do your children call for you when they need a hug?
Do your siblings try to keep in touch?
Do you love others honestly?
Do you turn the other cheek?
Do you walk through life with your eyes open and you hands ready to help?
Do you try to be a better person and view your flaws honestly?
Would you give a kidney to your sick brother?
Would you give up your place in a Que for a stranger with a greater need?
Do you find pleasure in making others happy?
Do you understand what it is to forgive?
Do you love?
Do you live?
These are some things to measure your worth by.
These are the things that help us to love ourselves.
Because if you cant find your own value, if you cant love yourself,
than who will?

Nii Laryea

In this body that you hold, kiss and caress there was a wound
A seething poisonous wound
Inflicted by another long before you ever touched my skin
Your warm arms held me together
Your sweet lips sucked the poison from my veins
But when you were away from home and silence filled my day i longed for you
Loneliness and sorrow crept up on me like snakes from the grass and struck
Sinking their poisonous fangs back into my mutilated form
But still your words kept the vultures from descending
You sent for Aid and the healers came and gave me anti-venom
They tended me and patched my form with knowledge and truth
But still the wound was there
When your warm arms held me again the wound began to close
Your soft kisses stitched the edges together, your strong voice bound them tight
You warmed my blood with your passion and set fire to my soul
You pushed and pulled so tenderly
I fell to my highest point and shuddered calling your name
You sealed the wound and scared it with your potent love
I am whole again and more
You made me strong, now none can pierce my flesh
I need wear no armor for i am iron clad in your radiant love
And bullet proof in my ecstasy.

King Solomon's Mines

I am currently reading King Solomon's Mines by H.Rider Haggard. Got stuck at my grandmothers for a month as i was sick and all she has are those cheep paperbacks you get in the $2 bin at the newsagents. Found this interesting volume on one of her dusty shelves. Apparently they made it into a movie back when Sharon Stone was in her late teens. Basically 3 very colonial British men set out with a small company of native servants across a South African dessert to Sheba's left breast, on a suicide mission in search of one of their fellows who had gone missing 2years prior. Following a map drawn by a dead man with his own blood on his shirt tail, they suffer heat, thirst, hunger and freezing temperatures not to mention mysterious natives who knows what next. I haven't got to the end yet but have been enjoying the read. It uses allot of very colonial language quite a bit of which i know my West African husband would not approve of, but that's how it was back then. The story is very well written captivating the time and place beautifully. Plenty of mystery and adventure, not to mention elephant hunting. Would completely recommend to anyone with a taste for adventure and native voodoo.

Back to work

I'm really back now, truly, I promise.
I've just had another beautiful girl, but there are enough baby blogs out there and this isn't one of them so i wont go further than to say she sleeps wonderfully and is beautiful. Back to work, i'm going to give you one new post every week, I know your used to almost one a day (or none at all) but here's hoping quality will over rule quantity. I'm working on something different from my usual fantasy/love stuff it's called "2 Days with Bethany" please let me know what you think and if i get anything horribly wrong comment! This is totally new stuff for me.

Love you all :)